hey everyone I have some sad news?

I have been feeling so down lately! I notice my psoriasis have been flaring worse then before and I am feeling a bit or shall I say super down lately I feel horrible like a skelly fish and it is bothering me last night I had a nerve breakdown and I swear their are times when is minor and times like yesterday when is worse also feeling like my boyfriend might leave me do to this matter for someone else any who that’s not the case thank god but in my previous relationship my ex had maid me feel so uncomfortable and had told me that it don’t matter who is with me eventually they will leave me because I look disgusting I know I am not suppose to listen to his crap right but certain words hits hard I know I am no longer in that relationship but those words lingered in my mind when ever the psoriasis gets worse I swear I am a positive person but when it comes to this subject guys I am week I swear I try every cream and laser light for it and nothing I also have history with this condition when I was 8 I had this all over my body but I was a little girl then but it also went away I just been dealing with this for the past 4 years now but this time it don’t want to go away this is crazy I feel so ugly sad down and then some I know I am beautiful I just don’t believe it sometimes or when the psoriasis gets worse I am with an amazing men now and I don’t want him to feel disgusted at me or by seeing me like this I tend to not want him in the bathroom if I shower because I don’t want him to see me or when we are in the bed room I tend to always have the light off because I don’t want him to be disgusted I let my past nail me with all the negative and is hard to move past that I really feel bad I know I have a nice body shape and I look good with clothes but when it comes to looking in the mirror I see that nasty person I need to get my self esteem up again I was never like this I didn’t care what others thought about me but this is a sensitive subject for me I just want you guys to know that their are things I am not proud of and I struggle with because truth be told I am not perfect at all trust me and I struggle through this for the past 4 years and I need to stay positive but when I see my self in the mirror I see ugly and have of the time I don’t want to look at myself because of this!

here you have something personal about me that I am not proud of!

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